December Editorial: Guitar and Eli

“I believe that life events do not unfold randomly. All of us have reflected on turning points in our lives and seen that lessons came our way at exactly the time we need them. Some hidden intelligence seems to know when and how to transform us – often when we least expect it.”

From Deepak Chopra in How to Know God

I want to talk about that moment in time when two souls meet in an unexpected but incredible way and there is almost a !crack! of recognition for each other. A knowing that goes beyond knowing and beyond the moment in time when you have just met.

I was marveling about this with a friend once and she described it like vibrating at the same frequency – so we all walk through the world, vibrating at our own little frequency and everyone around us is vibrating in their frequency and every once in a while you meet someone with the exact same frequency and recognize them.

There is another word that I love to describe the same event – anam cara – soul friend.

Perhaps it has happened to you or perhaps it has not but there are times when two people meet and they understand each other at such a deep level that it’s very hard to explain. And the excitement and joy that comes from a meeting like that or a friendship that develops out of a meeting like that is very special indeed.

So now I want to tell you about George and Eli. My family is blessed to be embraced into a community of generous, kind and loving people who enjoy two things that make my own heart sing – music and the outdoors. We are even more blessed because this far flung group of people come together a few times a year to enjoy the company of each other, to enjoy the outdoors and most of all, to enjoy the music we all make together.

Eli and George met this past summer at the summer cabin gathering we call “Kirkstock” when Eli had just turned four years old. Eli had waist length blonde ringlets, huge blue eyes and his new tie dyed t-shirt on. It was his first Kirkstock.

Now, to understand Kirkstock, I probably need to describe it a bit for you. Our friend owns a cabin on a hill. A log cabin – one room with a loft for sleeping. No running water, no electricity – but a view that would stop your heart. He invites his friends up once or twice a year to camp out, hang out, sit around the bonfire and sing. Kirkstock grows every year and this year there must have been 25 tents and maybe 50 people or so. All ages, all styles of musical taste.

I arrived late in the afternoon on a Saturday late in August, my offering for the potluck and three boys in tow. We got comfortable on the deck with the amazing view on an old couch and settled in quietly to read the rest of the latest Harry Potter and eat a snack. It was quiet, there were little bunches of people sitting here and there. Music, guitars and voices began drifting our way, so we sat and listened and enjoyed.

George plays guitar. He plays it brilliantly and Eli was drawn to him immediately and just stood watching and listening and dancing all afternoon. Eli thought George was very special. He turned to me and said , “Mommy, this music makes my heart happy”

Ahhhh. Exhale. We have found a special place in the world.

As the day wore on we helped prepare dinner and more guitars played and then the fires were started and the full moon came up and it got dark. With belly’s full of wonderful food and air smelling like wood smoke mingled with evening dew we settled in. Eli danced and loved the music – especially the stuff the university kids played – Tragically Hip and other, newer songs. Then George sat down on the rock and began his foloksy songs, joined by 3 or 4 other guitars. Eli, who by this time felt completely at home, climbed right into Georges lap and “helped” him play guitar. George showed him how to strum, showed him the hand to use for his chords and was absolutely content to sing as Eli strummed. They connected. They were friends. Eli told George that he was pretty sure Santa would bring him a guitar. George’s eyes sparkled. I think they recognized the music in each other and that is what made them click the way they did.

Anyway, the full moon got higher in the sky and Eli curled in my lap in a blanket fell asleep to Gordon Lightfoot and Valdi and Jim Croche and John Prine. It was lovely. It was a night none of my boys will forget. A memory that will live in them and with them as they get older.

As a child my family was very musical. My mother’s brothers used to get together every Boxing day and my uncles would play all those same songs and my mother would sing – Lightfoot, Valdi, Jim Croche, Simon and Garfunkel. My earliest memories of family connection and warmth is with music. Falling asleep in the arms of some uncle or aunt or by the fireplace wrapped in blankets while the grown-ups sang into the night. I’ve been so very fortunate to find it all again. I feel I’ve come home with these people. It makes my heart happy too.

Well, to continue with this story, last weekend George was in Toronto for our last gathering of the year and I get a call midafternoon:

“Is Santa bringing little Eli a guitar?” he asked me.

I wasn’t exactly sure what to answer because, in truth, Sandy had found a toy guitar and had it wrapped and put away since October.

I answered “Santa is working on it.”

Then George explained in his gruff way that he had remembered little Eli and the way he was drawn to music and he and his wife Sandy would very much like to give a guitar to Eli as a special gift.

My goodness! The generosity to give a child an instrument! And this was not a toy cowboy guitar with plastic strings like I had hidden in the closet!

That evening George did give Eli the guitar and the look on Eli’s face when he realized that beautiful little guitar with the real metal strings was his very own was pure joy that only a child can feel. George gave him one of his very own picks and Eli played and George used a beer bottle as a slide and Eli sang.

Eli plays his guitar every day. He says “George gave me this guitar and someday I am going to be a rockstar!”

And I say, whatever makes your heart happy my dear.

To George and Sandy, thank you so very much for being open to recognizing that part of Eli that you did.

Counting my many blessings always.

Dr. Lisa Doran